The first part of the trip was fairly easy. That's funny!!!! You remember my Moose's arch-enemy, don't you? i hate dress shoes. Did it make more sense that this text? He even tried to hide the sword behind his back! How can any company that takes so many "wholesome" pictures not be? Thou shalt not eat spuds. Either I am growing more comfortable with my on-line writing, or I am progressivly getting more insane and chaotic. My calculator is nifty. 3,861 . Thank you for sending me this email. For an ENTIRE MONTH I have possesed the arcane knowledge, but I forgot to share it with you, my loyal potentially imaginary reader. I know, I took you completly by suprise. What I liked best was the philosophy on choices. I know it was her idea, 'cause my dad hates it, too. The Longest Story in The World. Out loud. It was fun, but exhausting. What's that. Would that be considered poetic justice, or just a nice coincidence? Stay tuned to hear my thoughts on tanning, and an evil card game, and who knows what elseOkay I'm back. Warning* Extremely long pasta. *sigh* *sniffle* *snort* *insert word that is a sound that begins with an "s" here* I don't have much time, so, I must be brief. Anyway, sorry for the lack of relative weirdness, conspiracy theories and doughnuts (my Moose ate them all). That is justpathetic. If not, then some day, when the Internet is down and I'm really bored, I will construct a model OFCR and attempt to launch it. I'm glad you're not just in my life but that you're my better half. VisitMy Modern Met Media. Uhyou don't have to take the subliminal stuff seriously. I don't know if Iraq even existed in the Civil War Era! The magic eight-ball glows with knowledge! And really angry, and confused. But I'm sure that if I just would have put my mind to it, I could have done it. You mean that I'm just randomly responding regardless of your reactions? Wellnow that I think about itaccording to my theory, ALL conspiracies are real and mislabled "paranoid" people are really the only ones who see the truth. I'm back. There are not enough words in the English language to describe the sheer coolness of the fight choreography, special effects and the plot. I think that they should routinly die a slow, savage, agonizing deathI was just saying a random thing that I would never, ever do.) We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. Goodbye! This is the LONGEST TEXT EVER! It's stupid. By Ben Lee. Insane, chaotichmmmmmI wonder who thought of it? The vendors get oodles of cash, and the kids get ice cream. Is it possible to make less sense? It sucked. Shoot them down like the dogs they are! and Jones: Sho, Kernel; sho now and catching him as he fell and commandeering the first passing wagon to take him to the house and carry him up the front steps and through the paintless formal door beneath its fanlight imported pane by pane from Europe which Judith held open for him to enter with no change, no alteration in that calm frozen face which she had worn for four years now, and on up the stairs and into the bedroom and put him to bed like a baby and then lie down himself on the floor beside the bed though not to sleep since before dawn the man on the bed would stir and groan and Jones would say, flyer I am, Kernel. I can clone myself and form and angry mob? It's an outrage! You people sicken me. No one I know is that obsessed with earrings, it was just an example. Come on everyone, group hug. I'm back! ME: Yep. I can usually fall back asleep (if I don't panic and think I'm late for school), but the stupid thing wakes me up again exactly seven hours after I originally fell asleep. I have heard some feedback suggesting that I make someway for people to remember where they stopped reading. It would sneeze, then start it's eight-hour-long death hum. You cannot deny the logic of my thinking! The title contains the longest word. Did I resume asking retorical questions? Anyway, seeya! Parents would buy their children computers, video games and other television neccesities. Seeya! Most people actually like to spend long periods of time exposing their vulnerable skin to the harmful rays of the sun. Do you know I never even had a computer untill just a few months ago (that's why I'm obsessivly writing here) So I won't pity you if you're computer dies for unexpected reasons. 51 min ago In English, and stuff, if you miss one little detail, at most you lose partial credit, but you usually get it all right. There is a world where you are a slave to your TOASTER OVEN. They aint whupped us yit, air they? this Jones who after the demon rode away with the regiment when the granddaughter was only eight years old would tell people that he was lookin after Majors place and niggers even before they had time to ask him why he was not with the troops and perhaps in time came to believe the lie himself, who was among the first to greet the demon when he returned, to meet him at the gate and say, Well, Kernel, they kilt us but they aint whupped us yit, air they? who even worked, labored, sweat at the demons behest during that first furious period while the demon believed he could restore by sheer indomitable willing the Sutpens Hundred which he remembered and had lost, labored with no hope of pay or reward who must have seen long before the demon did (or would admit it) that the task was hopeless-blind Jones who apparently saw still in that furious lecherous wreck the old fine figure of the man who once galloped on the black thoroughbred about that domain two boundaries of which the eye could not see from any point. It's a cheap shot." Im gonna start quoting from the Flaming Chicken Handbook! Similarly, it also displays the longest word used in the text. It was sad. I finnaly get some free time to rant and rave and all my topics just magically melted away. But I seriously wonder what something written by a senile person would be like. Hey, by the way. I hope not. While studying at Johns Hopkins University, Barth found himself writing about his native Eastern Shore Maryland in a pastiche style of middle Faulkner and late Joyce. He may have won some praise from a visiting young William Styron, but the finished opus didnt flyfor one thing, because Faulkner intimately knewhis Snopses and Compsons and Sartorises, as I did not know my made-up denizens of the Maryland marsh. The advice to write only what you know may not be worth much as a universal commandment. Hmmmmmhas any old, senile person ever written anything? GeeI wish I'd thought of that sooner. I wrote about furby, and how it was fun to watch it die. Or I could be like that annoying guy on T.V. It'd be like someone thinking that scabs are atractive, 'case they protect you from disease. Although I acted like an idiot. Though the record has been broken, Faulkner's legacy lives on. Naturally, I had many mixed feelings, primarily disgust, as I have not voluntarily eaten a Cheez-It in quite some time. She'll shake and run from it, then suddenly dive and bite it's head. WOOF! And that's just what I can list from memory. That teaches our youth that it's okay to agree to help someone, and then ruin their experiment. It's the sequel to the movie that revolutionized the standard by which we judge special effects. Ooooooooooooo! Any way, that's it for now. HmmmI seem to be entertaining myself though, even while reading what I wrote. So, we packed everthing up. No matter how long and twisted they get, they do not wilt, wither, or drag; they run river-like, turning around in asides, outraging themselves and doubling and tripling back. Her enemy is a fake Yorkshire Terrior (same species as her) made entirely out of goat hair. Think about it. I'm back again! If you'll look toward the bottom of this page, you'll notice that I added a nifty little thing called the "babel fish". I love my work, I love the kids I work with. | 13.41 KB, JSON | Josh says I probably won't remember writing any of this, but I can't sleep. HA-HA! Even though my schedule is technically supposed to be completly differnt. Are you tired. I know. Now her sister sounds an alarm whenever she sees the evil feather. I bet you wanna go eat some Ketchup covered Dum-B Gon right now, while watching "reality" TV. I think it's pretty funny. CEASE YOUR FLATULENT WINDS AND HEAR MY MIND NUMBING EXPULSIONS OF WICKED NOISE! Ahhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! * IT'S NOT FAIR! I'm pretty sure that the "smelly yellow ball" that he started throwing was his own feces (poo). WowI really must be bored. She answered: England, Russia, and (out of sheer desperation) Iraq. It's true, and all, but I have no proof about wal-mart, or certain fast food resteraunts. Needless to say, I felt right at home. If you have something better to do, why wouldn't you be doing it right now? Time for another quote from the FLAMING CHICKEN HANDBOOK!!! You know the one. And the plan would have failed and Neo might have died, along with a large portion of the city (the building was set to blow if there was any intruders) SoNeo's choice to attempt to save Trinity triggered the sequence of events that led to her death. We never spam. Otherwise you'd think I was delusional, or something. Oooo! And then I'll be writing for me again. But it's not. Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. Until thenI have absolutly no imaginary money. Then you'll need an "extra" pairfor special occasions. *Squirell wanders off in search of electrical sockets to sniff* What's that, Hypothetical Reader? The entire message board was like one big insane asylum. Waitaren't I already doing that? I should make bumber stickers saying that. In a moment of inspiration, I asked her who America fought. You complete me in all ways. i couldn't hear it because someone had put the speakers facing the audience. No guarantee that he'll succeed in saving Trinity. And almost never finish. Do you know story about the longest story in the world? Oh, who am I kidding. And if they're so poor, what possessed them to buy a monkey? You're still here. I hate irony. It's hard to type because of the bandaid on my finger. This would lead to a better, more stable economy. Even though air is light, that much air adds up. I don't care if I have to ride the bus home if I stop work. Code 452 of the Flaming Chickens Handbook states that the Patron Saint of Paperclips (ME!!!) Fire is free. I had some conspriacy or another to rant about. You're only browsing it. Hits all right. Look verbatim up. > You have blue hari..*gigles* I like hair. Wellany wayseeya! You see, if you memorize stuff, you only have to remember that the answer to number 6 is Clara Barton for a week, rather than having to remember that Clara Barton started the Red Cross for the rest of you life. Soair pressure can be a good thing. Of course, said adults would have to peel their butt-cheeks off the couchbut they'd have to do that for the delivary man anyway. We had to tell him that he would probley have to wait untill he was 21. In otherwords, she's a small yappy dog who is big for her breed. Now I want all you loyal fans*cricket chirps* to go to the link to see what I'm like. Either way, Kodak is undeniably evil. Space is notorious for not having air. But wait! They're listening for a secrretno it's cause of a secret. I tend to make those tiny mistakes, and get bad grades, even if I understand the concepts. Which I suppose may be a good thing, seeing as how I'm currently in a Longest Text Ever Rivalry with Galaxy Dreamer's site. And then people will start reading. When I tried to talk to him, he tossed it away nonchalantly and pretended he hadn't heard me. The PSOA have been whole-heartedly working for you, and what have you done for them? I get done at 9:15. And if you expect something and get nothing, you feel cheated. Follow him at@jdmagness, by Josh Jones | Permalink | Comments (30) |. There may also be evil little links that are designed to confuse you. Making me(The Patron Saint of Paperclips) the Ruler of the Laws of Nature! If you want neat, go to some other site(though, as mentioned in Flaming Chickens Code:472 there is no such thing as a site better than this one). Plus, I am horrible at spelling. (Next Commercial) Get ready fo: Faux's new "reality" TV show, "How Low Can We Go?" This is going to be a WORLD RECORD! I'm back. That's why it MUST be EVIL! Since I have a rather weird phobia of touching my own skinthis made my evening my own personall torture session. I think. Okay. That had nothing to do whatsoever with subliminal messagesit's just cool to say. How could you? WAIDAMINIT!! Yes. Okay. To support Open Cultures educational mission, please consider making a donation. HenceforthCode: 666 of the Flaming Chickens Handbook states that under no circumstance will the Patron Saint of Paper Clips (guess who) be forced to wear anything other than a t-shirt and preferably black jeans. Sometimes I crack myself up. It is now my civic duty to discover this ancient mystery, and reveal it to the uncaring world. We think. yeah. To prevent this, I did nothing. WellI DO have a special treat for you weirdos who apparantly like wasting time! What a crazy idea. Plus, boxes are more convient than bags. EryeahI'm back. I accidently cut it with scizzors. Speaking of virtual pets, I'm revamping the ones on this site. It's like this. Please find all options here. Although I can't see why you care, because there is a large probability that you do not exist, because I don't think anyone is reading this anymore. the whole time, even during the name-calling, seniors were playing with silly string and beachballs. If the facts beg to differ, than the facts are wrong. You'd have to be an absolute loser (or really bored) to come here. In any case, I hope you enjoyed our patheticness. America? This is actually my third attempt at doing this. It cannot behmmmmmaybe I should just use IMAGINARY duct tapeit's easier to come by ,but it's much more expensiveI'm not sure what to do. Aren't I special? I can't really work on this site even though I now have a more in depth understanding of variables. I'm leavingnow I'm back! But then I listened to some of the new music I put on my site and mellowed out. Anyone just randomly typing letters will eventually accidently write a word, right? Or, as an alternative, I could have ruined several plans for world domination that other people made. 11. *cough*She's winning*cough* But that's just because I have so much to do to mantain and update this site, I rarely get a chance to just sit here and type. YOU WILL NOT SINK MY CHEERIO!! I'm just bored. The following is everything I wrote during that sugar-coated time period. My mom said that she didn't care. Speaking of food, what's up with pie? Anyway, I'm gonna go. However . The World's Largest Maths Problem Has Been Solved, And It. Josh wants his thought back. I've spent the past three years of my life EXPECTING each semester to be like a mini-year. Next thing you know, you're internet connection will die. I thought of another very good reason to assist with the Official Flaming Chickens Lunar Colony! During the weekdays, I get about seven hours of sleep (usually less) and wake up at 6:11 a.m. Yep. i broke the world record. Either way, I'm continuing to sort of entertain myself. Doesn't that make you feel better? (Think of the fake-looking Star Trek aliens). HILARIOUS! And I feel weird! I'm back. I tell people I know about this site, but they either ignore this page, or don't even bother coming to the site in the first place. Yep! HOW ARE YOU DOING? longest possible text for discord. I've finnally figured out sorta, maybe, kinda, how to do stuff to make it more real. The sleeping person will gradually get used to it (and incorporate it into their dreams). And then the quality will go down and the vicious spiral of good and bad will continue untill I either give up this text, or go crazyer. They start out with half that number, and then just fill in words until they have the right amount. So far two whole people (to my knowledge) have read the entire thing, and a few people have skimmed it. Untill such time that I have more. Yes, I am. Think about it. NowI'm gonna go and worry about the light on my toaster ovenseeya! if you like our Facebook fanpage, you'll receive more articles like the one you just read! Unless, of course, the government was smart enough to have cameras without the blinkie light. He always enjoyed it because it meant that somewhere, he was the Supreme Dictator of the Galaxy. It's early. All this information and more is yours for the low, low price of 5 payments of $29.99! Outside your body. It sucks. Any derogatory statement is simply an opinion of an individual, not of the flaming order of the flaming chickens. Apparently the point of the game was to get your character to shout "Whoo-Hoo!" But opting out of some of these cookies may affect your browsing experience. But that's the kind of thing I like. NowI know what you guys are thinkingsome of those items on that list are gonna be hard to find. Now, most families will go bowling, or putt-putt golfing. Sometimes I just do this, you know? School has been on for four days now. Fire is my frienduntil it burns me. There is a world where you are a faerie. Waithowhow can I BE logic? Founder @ World's Best Story amplifier of creativity & fun! Just like everyone else in my family. Unless he has already been destroyed by an even more radical Anti-Cartoon-Owl group. Okay, fill out the TAB form, so I have proof that you bothered to come here anduhI'lluhsend you a sandwich? *giggling* It's very, very late at nite. . Then it must diepainfully. How did they ever afford an organ-thingy? Fighting in the American Civil War? Now THAT'S just weird. Obviously, you know this. Yes, it goes on and on my friend. You knowI enjoy having these conversations with you. In school, back before I even owned a computer, I'd type random words for long periods of time, 'cause I had nothing better to do. Somehow, I managed to make my furby die. Just make sure you "spray" your food first. Trinity, who is of course outside of the Matrix, knows this and chooses to enter the Matrix to save the day. In any case, wouldn't the blinkie light help night-vision cameras see in the dark? Physics is so FREAKIN' hard! Since I'm not particualarly inspired at the moment, I should leave and let you gather what is left of your sanity. While. *there's that darn cricket again* And I have a genuine question to ask all of my loyal readers *cough-cough* Okay, here it is: Is it normal for a non-gender specific sibling to carry around various dead reptiles (snakes, turtles, lizards etc.) I only signed up for a semester. She goes crazy if someone holds it, 'cause it's getting attention and not her. If that happens, then no one will read this. I got to go to a huge library, and see Terminator 3 at the local theater. Called the Boolean Pythagorean Triples problem, it was Solve Now. It's not fair. *g8ggles* bye. Can a senile person write? It's just a matter of degree. THey might havve been important, but we keep forgetting them. "a pokemon game. Ice cream trucks! . Wasn't that semi-entertaining? The previous sentence made absolutly no sense. *nods* I thought so. It makes sense, though. May your day be shiney! Apparantly Grape Pie isn't mainstream, but it has existed for some time. Sometimes, it is lazy. The sentence ends up with a 3,609,750-letter . WE have been having very profound thoughts lately. this is not a long paragraph it is multiple, I am just not as pretty as my friend Haylee she is fab so give me a chance for this job. Any miniute now. I'm baaaaa-ack! Between her bickering with my sister, and obsessivly playing neopets games, I don't know what to do with her. were stuck in here, (alone my dear) and well problem never get out so dont start to shout. Which is what I do best. I rule theer*random Loyal Minion whispers in ear* That's right! No matter how unlikely something is, if the universe is infinite, it's happening an infinite number of times. Longest Sentence. NowI bet you're wondering why I don't just wake up a few minutes before I have to go. Even if I put it in a less chaotic, more user-friendly format people would still ignore this because it involves: reading. Maybe you'll break free. Too bad. A copy of "Ulysses" pops up in "Green Coaster," the 33-page, single-sentence . BoyI really enjoy confusing myself! Anyway, yeah, I'm a furry, but since I'm a young furry, I can't really do as much as I would like to do in the fandom. In other wordsthey hurt. I'm gonna launch THE OFFICIAL FLAMING CHICKENS LUNAR COLONY! You know, the small, white feather. I needs the duct tape! And once again suprised. Now you may be wondering what horrible beast is Moose's arch-enemy. Why do I have to work year round? Then he preceeded to trash my room, scattering kleenex everywhere. Because they put subliminal messages in them, of course! Now I do. It's not like I have anything better to do. You see, my school has "block" scheduling. Or maybe it's notI meanwon't the quality *snicker* of my work deteriorate if I am no longer writing for the target audience of me? If you can sleep through a raging fire, close enough to set off the smoke detector, then you are definitly going to sleep through the smoke detector. A man has been recorded spending more than three hours to pronounce what is supposedly the longest word in the English language . | 13.41 KB, JSON | After all, isn't that basicly what the best teachers do? 5000 hits! There are an infinite number of worlds with Harry Potter. She's my little puppyshe fears grape flavored stuff, wind, rain, television, noise, silence, small children and pretty much everything. Which is what I'm about to do. I'm back. Number Nine: Now it's just getting redundant, isn't it? But they really were'nt buffoal wings 'cause buffalo's don't have wingscause they come off when they are babies, JOsh says so and he must be right causse he's been having Profound Thoughts even though he cannot remember them. It's time to warn you, the viewererreaderabout the evils of various stuff. Hmmmmmmm. And because she was the head fasion bimbo, everyone agreed that the look was definitly "in". They couldn't stop laughing. School children won't be able to correctly identify the color of a zebra. Right now, I have another twenty minutes on the Internet before I'm gonna watch T.V. So he probably didn't see the majority of my site. Soif you wish to contribute to this great and magneficent and magestic and MOOSEY projectwe need the following things: 739 rolls of aluminium foil (preferably the extra shiny kind) 417 refridgerator boxes, 9000 rolls of "sticky on both sides" duct tape, 300 lbs of chicken feathers (preferably white) and 1 (one) thermo-nuclear-rocket-thruster. The height is regained at night, when you're laying down. Just exactly like Father if Father had known as much about it the night before I went out there as he did the day after I came back thinking Mad impotent old man who realized at last that there must be some limit even to the capabilities of a demon for doing harm, who must have seen his situation as that of the show girl, the pony, who realizes that the principal tune she prances to comes not from horn and fiddle and drum but from a clock and calendar, must have seen himself as the old wornout cannon which realizes that it can deliver just one more fierce shot and crumble to dust in its own furious blast and recoil, who looked about upon the scene which was still within his scope and compass and saw son gone, vanished, more insuperable to him now than if the son were dead since now (if the son still lived) his name would be different and those to call him by it strangers and whatever dragons outcropping of Sutpen blood the son might sow on the body of whatever strange woman would therefore carry on the tradition, accomplish the hereditary evil and harm under another name and upon and among people who will never have heard the right one; daughter doomed to spinsterhood who had chosen spinsterhood already before there was anyone named Charles Bon since the aunt who came to succor her in bereavement and sorrow found neither but instead that calm absolutely impenetrable face between a homespun dress and sunbonnet seen before a closed door and again in a cloudy swirl of chickens while Jones was building the coffin and which she wore during the next year while the aunt lived there and the three women wove their own garments and raised their own food and cut the wood they cooked it with (excusing what help they had from Jones who lived with his granddaughter in the abandoned fishing camp with its collapsing roof and rotting porch against which the rusty scythe which Sutpen was to lend him, make him borrow to cut away the weeds from the door-and at last forced him to use though not to cut weeds, at least not vegetable weeds -would lean for two years) and wore still after the aunts indignation had swept her back to town to live on stolen garden truck and out o f anonymous baskets left on her front steps at night, the three of them, the two daughters negro and white and the aunt twelve miles away watching from her distance as the two daughters watched from theirs the old demon, the ancient varicose and despairing Faustus fling his final main now with the Creditors hand already on his shoulder, running his little country store now for his bread and meat, haggling tediously over nickels and dimes with rapacious and poverty-stricken whites and negroes, who at one time could have galloped for ten miles in any direction without crossing his own boundary, using out of his meagre stock the cheap ribbons and beads and the stale violently-colored candy with which even an old man can seduce a fifteen-year-old country girl, to ruin the granddaughter o f his partner, this Jones-this gangling malaria-ridden white man whom he had given permission fourteen years ago to squat in the abandoned fishing camp with the year-old grandchild-Jones, partner porter and clerk who at the demons command removed with his own hand (and maybe delivered too) from the showcase the candy beads and ribbons, measured the very cloth from which Judith (who had not been bereaved and did not mourn) helped the granddaughter to fashion a dress to walk past the lounging men in, the side-looking and the tongues, until her increasing belly taught her embarrassment-or perhaps fear;-Jones who before 61 had not even been allowed to approach the front of the house and who during the next four years got no nearer than the kitchen door and that only when he brought the game and fish and vegetables on which the seducer-to-bes wife and daughter (and Clytie too, the one remaining servant, negro, the one who would forbid him to pass the kitchen door with what he brought) depended on to keep life in them, but who now entered the house itself on the (quite frequent now) afternoons when the demon would suddenly curse the store empty of customers and lock the door and repair to the rear and in the same tone in which he used to address his orderly or even his house servants when he had them (and in which he doubtless ordered Jones to fetch from the showcase the ribbons and beads and candy) direct Jones to fetch the jug, the two of them (and Jones even sitting now who in the old days, the old dead Sunday afternoons of monotonous peace which they spent beneath the scuppernong arbor in the back yard, the demon lying in the hammock while Jones squatted against a post, rising from time to time to pour for the demon from the demijohn and the bucket of spring water which he had fetched from the spring more than a mile away then squatting again, chortling and chuckling and saying `Sho, Mister Tawm each time the demon paused)-the two of them drinking turn and turn about from the jug and the demon not lying down now nor even sitting but reaching after the third or second drink that old mans state of impotent and furious undefeat in which he would rise, swaying and plunging and shouting for his horse and pistols to ride single-handed into Washington and shoot Lincoln (a year or so too late here) and Sherman both, shouting, Kill them!
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